And now for something completely different! Those GROGs who couldn’t manage to get to the March Lunch missed an absolute treat. The 94 who did turn up enjoyed a knee-slapping, tear-inducing, virtuoso performance from the late stand in speaker, Robbie Duncan. The deadpan, laconic delivery from this Ayr RFC member was one which will go into GROGS folklore and, already, the question is being asked - “When can we get him back?”. An Ayrshire man, a self confessed amateur and junior football fan and, in fact, a player at both levels, Robbie is a comparatively recent convert to rugby having introduced himself and his son to it only 10 years ago at Kilmarnock RFC where he found a new personal hero in the shape of the iconic Bill Cuthbertson. Not much more was said about rugby, which suited everyone in the audience as it left more time to Robbie’s excellent series of one liners, stories and jokes. For the seasoned after dinner attendees, the repeating of the occasional familiar ones, delivered in such style, proved well worth the wait. 2 non p.c. stories about Jersey Rugby Club and Alex Salmond, which can’t be repeated in this Report, had GROGs seriously concerned about their powers of retention, concerns which heightened with Robbie’s delivery of irreverent accounts of visiting Tonga rugby players, the reality STV programme, “The Scheme” and his account of a couple of fictional clients of an unnamed dating website. All in all, an excellent GROGS’ Lunch thanks to a talented guest speaker who had kindly filled in at the last minute. The extended applause told its own story. There were even some whistles of appreciation - from, of all places, the normally sedate table frequented by Western Gailes G.C. members. For his trouble, Robbie received the first of the new style bottles of GROGS whisky and a promise of financial support to his favoured charity, the Ayrshire Hospice.